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Dear Diary #5 - Magnifico
So, this was hard because all of Amayaβs diaries probably have mention Magnifico, since those from the day they met. So instead, I wrote this inspired by musings from last night.
Β Dear DiaryAn entry mentioning Magnifico
Dear Diary,
I think.. I might be pregnant. Well, no, Iβm pretty certain I am.
I donβt know how I let this happen. Ever since my miscarriage, which feels so long ago now, Iβve been very careful. Overly careful if anything. I could never bear to fall pregnant again, fearing having to deal with that pain all over when my body ultimately failed me, as I believed it would.
But three months ago, Magnifico took me away from the city on a lovely little holiday, just the two of us, and whatβs a girl to do when left alone with her gorgeous husband for days, with nothing to do but reconnect with him?
And gods did we reconnect. Repeatedly. Who could blame me for losing myself in Magnifico? Who could blame me for forgetting to be careful?
And now here we are. How do I tell him? Do I tell him? Do I wait? What if I tell him and it all goes wrong again? How could I live with myself if I raised his hopes only to disappoint him again?
I donβt know what to do. I donβt want to get hurt again but I canβt help but dream of a future with a child, our child, a miniature mix of Magnifico and me, with my dark curls and his stunning blue eyes, with his charisma and my kindness.. and with his confidence, theyβd be unstoppable.
I shouldnβt think about this. I canβt.
If I let myself dream, it will hurt too much if itβs taken away.
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